all right

Occasionally adding corroborative details to add verisimilitude to otherwise bald and unconvincing,
but veridicous accounts
with careful attention, indefatigable assiduity, and nice discrimination.

18 July, 2014

Two Heartening Exhortations

On Facebook, and on other “social media”, people often post, repost and re-repost all sorts of encouraging axioms and other droll examples of wisdom; here are two recent examples:



How wise!  Consider, then, a consequent situation: 
In a grimy, urban garage in a large, formerly well-developed but increasingly decrepit city, a masked youth approaches a mechanic, lounging against a wall covered in painted and printed slogans. 
Masked Man:  I’m a friend of Mad Mo.  I hear you have some AK-47s you might be able to sell me, and ammunition, and stuff.
MechanicUh-huh.
Masked Man:  I could do with some guns and ammo, see, because right now there’s a convention of Jewish oil-men in a hotel in town—one owned by Jews, by the way—and I’d like, y’know, to shoot them.
Mechanic:  Are you sure you want to do that?  Would that be a wise or good thing to do?
Masked ManWhat are you?  A critic?  The world has plenty of critics already.  You should be an encourager.  Look, you have a poster saying so.
Mechanic:  True.  Sorry.  Right, I encourage you to run through all that again; how might I help you?
Masked Man:  If you have the power to make someone happy, you should do it.  The world needs more of that.  It would make me happy to kill quite a few Jews, and did I mention that it’s a convention of gay Jews?  It is.  Very gay and very Jewish.  And they’re climate-deniers.  Making profits from fossil-fuels, y’know.
Mechanic:  All right, I’ll grab you a couple of AKs and a back-pack of ammo.
Masked Man:  It would make me very happy indeed if you would arm me to the teeth at a considerable discount.
Mechanic:  Well, if it will make you happy.  Would you be happy if I threw in armour-piercing rounds and a reloadable RPG with a sixpack?
Masked Man:  Very happy indeed. 
Mechanic:  All right then, will do.

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